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11 UK Hip Hop Tunes To Punch Your Boss To…

January 26, 2024 by Kieron Sullivan

Most of the time when I punch my boss in the face it’s because Tempa T ‘Next Hype’ has come on shuffle. Lethal Bizzle ‘POW’ is a close runner up. Especially satisfying if amongst a flurry of hooks and uppercuts you can manage to time saying “Right in the kisser” directly after each moment Lethal B shouts “POW!”

While grime might hold the monopoly on aggy tunes, its less hyped and often more chilled relative, UK hip hop, definitely has its moments. Lest we forget that, here’s a rundown of tunes from the scene to completely lose your shit to. And a couple that aren’t even rowdy but vaguely fit with the bizarre employment angle…

DISCLAIMER: No bosses have been punched in the making of this countdown. Don’t actually punch your boss. They almost definitely will not enjoy it and at best will fire you.

Ocean Wisdom – Walkin‘
Type of Punch: Bibbidybop him on the nibbidynoggin.

Up for debate as to whether this is even a real type of punch or just nonsense. Will leave your boss 110% bamboozled.

Baileys Brown – Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuusshhh!!!
Type of punch: Punch him in the nads with your foot.

“I kick a hippy in bollocks while he’s meditating/and do the moonwalk dancing as I’m celebrating.” (Dirty Dike – 2013)
Pretty self explanatory. Obviously works better if your boss is a hippy but not essential. Do the deed and then dance for your victory with joyful abandon until forcibly removed by security or the police.

Big Toast – Anyone Order A Tough Guy? Ft The Strange Neighbour
Type of punch: Standard Wetherspoons haymaker.

A timeless classic. A clumsy thump to the headpiece to suit any occasion. Doesn’t matter what type of employment you’re in as long as its in Kent, Essex or select parts of London.

Lips to da Floor – LDZ
Type of Punch: Not a punch. Choke slam that motherfucker.

OK, yes this list was supposed to be specifically a list of UK hip hop tunes to commit nonsensical workplace assaults to. Yes, this is blatantly a grime tune. HOWEVER. As LDZ gang are longstanding actors in the hip hop sphere and ‘Lips to da Floor’ is more of a parody of grime than anything, it’s sneaked its way in. Anyway. Enough about that. This tune is carnage. If you were told that someone was going to give you a beating to a song of their choosing and this started playing you would soil yourself.

Rhyme Asylum – For The Hate
Type of Punch: All the punches. Wear a Knuckle Duster.

Overkill is the name of the game. Besides the relentless onslaught of fists, be creative with it. Really use the space and express yourself. Think WWE but with more office equipment.

Dirty Dike – Return of the Twat
Type of Punch: Left hook followed by a pie to the face.

This one is best served after a long, life-affirming absence from work somewhere cheap and sunny that’s mainly consisted of drinking and taking enough drugs to kill a meth addicted rhino. You’ve got a two-week hangover, you’re an hour late, everybody hates you already. Moments before you arrive, you come to the realisation that you are above your menial 9 to 5 and stop to buy a pie.

Terra Firma – 2006: Roller Ball
Type of Punch: Doesn’t matter. Just has to be executed at speed on rollerblades.

Do you work outside? Somewhere with pavement for aforementioned blades? Perhaps you work for the council in one of London’s many parks? Or maybe you are a traffic warden and have just realised that literally any job would be less shit? If so, this one could be just the ticket. Simply lure your boss to a location with a decent straight for the purposes of momentum and execute. Terra Firma’s ultra-rowdy 2006 banger (repurposing the soundtrack of the 1975 movie featuring James Caan being a tough guy on skates) is really the only choice for this manoeuvre.

Strange U – Klaatu Barada Nikto:
Type of punch: Hadouken

May require magical ninja powers.

Million Dan – Dogz and Sledgez
Type of Punch: Brawl Starter

Voted most likely to get out of hand quick. Your work setting and what type of punch you throw to this certified dancefloor destroyer are both irrelevant. Within the first 5 seconds all your co-workers have got involved and someone’s thrown a table.

Hire Me – Dr Syntax
Type of Punch: Happy slap your current boss during a video interview for a new job

A brave new solution to the treacherous waters of sneaking around trying to find new employment while still at your current job. (Planning required but the pay-off shall be mighty.)

Step 1: When invited to your final round interview, suggest a conference call via skype instead of meeting in person. This will peak your prospective employer’s interest by showing you know how to use a computer and they will be unable to refuse.
Step 2: Arrange call for office hours. Play ‘Hire Me’ ridiculously loud while yelling at the top of your voice into your computer about your ability to work as part of a team.
Step 3: Drawn over by the unusual presence of beats and bars in the office and the spectacle of one of their valued employees apparently completely losing their mind… your boss should appear in view of your webcam in no time.
Step 4: They’ve fallen into your cleverly orchestrated trap. Slap them.

New employers will take this as decisive and assertive. They’ll see you mean business about coming aboard and most likely will double your starting salary.

Fliptrix – Wylin Out
Type of punch: Interdimensional uppercut to that motherfucker’s third eye.

You wake up. For some reason you’re gassed. You cook breakfast like a metalhead at a Pantera gig. The resulting food is gash so you dash it on the floor. Bust out the door like the day is your bitch. Galumph down the road like a Jabberwock on beans incorporating amateur pole dancing and parkour. Smash a melon or equivalent fruit if one dares to cross your path. If you spot someone consuming a kebab, shove it in their face as a warm-up to finally rejecting the corporate rat race. As you leap into your place of work with a truly terrifying level of energy for 9am on a Monday, your boss appears in front of you. Punch them in their pineal gland hard enough to fully disrupt the octagonal alignment of their circadian rhythm. Waltz out and start a record label.

184 X Big Toast – Backpack (ft John Paul & Breezy Lee)

October 26, 2020 by dylan

To mark todays release of the new 184 x Big Toast album ‘Who Shit in the Sandpit’ they’ve just dropped a visual for the video we filmed for ‘Backpack’ featuring John Paul & Breezy Lee.

Who Shit In the Sandpit is available on vinyl, CD, tape and digitally from Revorg Records

184 X Big Toast – This is England ft Breezy Lee

October 9, 2020 by Kieron Sullivan

Big Toast done did the nation a service by writing an honest replacement for the National Anthem. We asked 4 Kevs and 2 Barrys what they made of it. On the whole they non-ironically agreed that it’s bleak brand of patriotism was something they could get behind but mostly felt they needed something with more welly to sing from the bottom of their lungs while hurling pub furniture at Europeans before England away games.

For more top-shelf dystopian propaganda done as raps over 184 beats of the highest calibre, and perhaps even an answer to the question Who Shit In The Sandpit? cop a pre-order of the LP HERE.

Phoenix Da Icefire & Strange Neighbour – Expendables ft. Logic, Verb T, Fliptrix, Kyza, Cappo & More

September 1, 2020 by Kieron Sullivan

Phoenix Da Icefire & The Strange Neighbour ‘Expendables’ Lifted from Cinematic out now and available HERE.
Featuring: Manage, eMCee Killa, Tesla’s Ghost, Da Flyy Hooligan, Genesis Elijah, Big Cakes, Logic, Fliptrix, Verb T, Mic Assassin, Big Toast, Jack Diggs, Kyza & Cappo.
Starring: Alfie Green from Global Movement Agency LTD & DaddyMakesDoh Directed by Dfacer.

184 x Big Toast – F.W.L (ft The Strange Neighbour)

June 18, 2020 by Kieron Sullivan

Trust Revorg Records comrades Big Toast and The Strange Neighbour to come up with something this twistedly brilliant. At a time where the I’m-not-racists seem to be perpetually coming out of the social media woodwork to argue for continued idolatry of slave trader Edward Colston based on his philanthropy… This ode to gammon logic hits the collective nail on the head. Play ‘F.W.L’ to someone who fucking loves statues and watch them get wildly offended while completely missing the point.

New LP from 184 and Big Toast is on the way. Its called Who s**t in The Sandpit? Because Toast.

TPS Fam – Who Drank the Rider?

January 19, 2020 by Kieron Sullivan

Finally an answer to the age old question. If you’ve ever found yourself perplexed at where your rider has gone. TPS Fam did it. Beat on ‘Who Drank the Rider?’ by Hermit the Slob is a banger and verses from Big Toast, The Strange Neighbour and Jack Diggs are all hard. Gold stars all round.

IYDK: Big Toast & 184 – Prolefeed

January 7, 2019 by Ben Graham

January’s a bit shit, isn’t it? It’s that time of the year when nobody wants to go out, nobody has any money and the weather never evolves past ‘grey and drizzly’. Pile on the incoming environmental apocalypse, economic Armageddon and the impending collapse of the NHS and it’s enough to make you yearn for a quiet little cave somewhere in Afghanistan. Thankfully, Revorg Records’ Big Toast and producer 184 (of Gangoon Dubz fame and Western Decadence co-founder) have the antidote. The rapper and producer have teamed up to bring you Prolefeed; a grim, hilarious and all too real glimpse into our fractured little island.

As you might have guessed from the title, Prolefeed has a distinct focus on the modern working class experience. Inequality, class and conspiracy theories all get a look in – and are all suitably savaged by Big Toast – but this isn’t some Billy Bragg-style ode to the working man – it’s a verbal dissection of how our own narcissistic, celebrity-obsessed mentality has allowed a generation of Patrick Bateman’s in-the-making to prosper (and, in one extreme case, become President).

Big Toast & 184 – Leaky Bag

‘Leaky Bag’ captures the mood of a generation adrift in a sea of zero hour contracts and Insta-gratification selfies. Meanwhile, ‘Have a Nice Day’ picks apart our artificial existence like an IKEA advert in reverse, dissembling our commercial mindset to expose our flatpack lives for what they are – interchangeable (and also quite shit if viewed from up close).

The production is on point, from the bluesy soul instrumentals of ‘High Horse’ to the simple piano chords of ‘Before the Wankers’. For an album named after the sterilised plastic “entertainment” offered to the ‘proles’ of Orwell’s 1984, Prolefeed covers a pretty diverse soundscape. But then, 184 has one of the best pedigrees in UK hip hop. Working alongside the likes of Jehst, Ramson Badbonez, Dr Syntax, Buggsy, and Jam Baxter, the Brighton-based producer has honed his style and developed a distinctive sound. “Copy paste dogshit-crafted creation” this most certainly ain’t.

Big Toast & 184 – Afraid of Americans

Of course, for those looking to their music as a means of tuning out the real world, Prolefeed might not be the antidote their looking for. In fact, coming at a time of civil war, doctors in food banks and economic seppuku, Prolefeed feels almost like a slap to the face, but maybe that’s just what we need. After all, as Toast himself says on Nothing Matters: “I’d rather be offensive than reject the intellectual.”

Prolefeed is out now on 184 Productions and Revorg Records.

Big Toast – Afraid of Americans

December 1, 2018 by Nick Russell

Dope new visual from Croydon rapper Big Toast, who pops shots at one of the most dangerous idiots in modern history. In the first single from Big Toast and 184‘s collaborative album, ‘Prolefeed’, the song takes aim at the personification of politicised stupidity, Donald Trump.

instagram.com/bigtoast_revorgrecords

Download via Bandcamp here.

TPS Fam – Rappertag Season 3 Episode 7

October 25, 2018 by dylan

TPS Fam got tagged in by Cracker Jon for the 7th Episode of Rappertag Season 3. The first ever crew episode! Find out who gets tagged in next…

Performed by:
Big Toast
The Strange Neighbour
Jack Diggs

Produced by:
Oliver Sudden
Satrumentalz
Jack Diggs

Jack Diggs & Big Toast – ‘Call It On’ Review

March 16, 2018 by Ben Graham

We live in trying times. Brexit, Trump, the impending threat of nuclear war, the resurgence of autotune; it’s enough to make anybody question just how long the human race has left. Thankfully, there are still some people making a case for our existence, even if it’s by pointing out that we’re all fucked.

After dropping their 2017 debut as 40% of the South London group Gatecrasherz, Jack Diggs & Big Toast are back to present Call It On and stick two fingers to the “bedwetter trendsetters.” An instant underground classic, Call It On serves up a helping of boom bap beats with a side of wry British humour to deliver a bitch slap to the Tarquin’s of 2018 Britain.

After establishing his credentials with his 2013 debut Dirty Finger Nails, Diggs’ production is on top form here. ‘Nocturnal’ sways like a Japanese skyscraper, smooth bars intercut with a smorgasbord of samples and more scratching than a crocodile at a dermatitis convention.

With Call it On, Toast and Diggs are angrier than ever. Razor sharp put-downs rub shoulders with delicious digs at everything from triggered teens to celebrity worship, all wrapped up in a sneering, caustic indictment of modern British society.

Simultaneously, the brothers aren’t above the odd schoolyard-cypher put down. Bars like “No difference whores, tarts and bitches, or shitty emcees with a poor grasp of English,” could go either way, but it’s delivered with such a bone-dry humour, it’s hard not to crack a grin.

Although Call it On is their first release as a duo, their time working alongside each other – not to mention with every other labelmate from Revorg Records – has honed Diggs & Toast’s delivery to a fine art. ‘Twelve Quid’ closes the album with a kick like a shotty, channeling the spirit of early Jehst to tear apart the entitled, royal wedding loving young-Tory mindset.

Above all else, you get the feeling that the London duo really is as cynical as they come across. Looking around at the world they paint, it’s understandable why. They might spit bars “more dead than a Tory’s conscience,” but as long as we have narrators like Big Toast and Jack Diggs to shine a light on the austerity, food banks and Jacob Rees-Mogg Jnr’s hiding beneath the surface of our ‘Strong and Stable’ nation, there might be hope just yet.

Call It On drops March 30, 2018, on Revorg Records. You can grab your physical or digital copy here.

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